Have you ever allowed yourself to think about your future? I mean to truly think about where you see your life in the next year, or five years, or, dare I say it, the next decade?
Lately, I'm doing good if I can allow myself the time to think about the next few hours in front of me. And, if I am being very honest, I find myself thinking more and more about the past. No, this is not an attempt to dive into the lake of nostalgia for a leisurely swim while taking frequent breaks to sip on a glass of Sangria. These thoughts tend to be a little more adrenaline-inducing in nature. About the time my head hits the pillow each night (and not a moment before), my brain decides it is time to get my heart pumping by throwing some not-so-stress-reducing self-reflection questions...such as "is today the 3rd - did I miss that appointment with the pediatrician?," or, "I remember agreeing to attend that webinar as a stand-in for my boss - that was scheduled for yesterday, wasn't it?". Inevitably, the inner voice that narrates these sleep-deterring questions launches into a barrage of profanity that would be perfectly acceptable, were I to find myself on a naval base or to have recently been informed that I would be teaching kindergarten for the remainder of the school year. Since I am neither a sailor nor crazy enough to surround myself with 30 five-year olds on a daily basis, it is most fortunate for everyone that this language remains within the confines of my brain. Mostly.
So, I believe I have already established that at this point in my life, my proverbial cup "runneth over" with the comings and goings of parenthood, of employment, and other various and basic oxygen consumption activities. Perhaps there is the rub. Oxygen consumption. Too many tasks, too little oxygen. Well, whatever the reason, what's one more task between friends. Or strangers. I'm blogging again, suckers. Keep your expectations high. Or low. Or live on the edge and throw expectations out the window. In any case, this is the blog of one Dad, his husband, and their two children. Deal with it.